Many people who break up with a husband, wife or lover know that there have been problems but they didn't realize how serious the other person thought it was. That's why there are so many broken-hearted people wondering how they lost the love of their life and how to get them back. It's not impossible to get your ex back but it will take some sincere effort on your part plus some serious self-examination.
If you are one of those people who were shocked when your love broke off the relationship, it's probably for one of two reasons: the person fell in love with someone else or felt that they just weren't important to you. Assuming there is not a third person in the picture, ask yourself why you did not see it coming. Are you too busy at work or were you spending too much time with your friends? Was a video game or computer time more enjoyable than spending time with them? Or did you just think they would always be there? This is one scenario that is repeated time and again in love affairs and sometimes it can present the easiest way to get your ex back.
Lack of attention isn't that easily remedied but if you work hard at it you can convince them that you've truly changed. Think about the priorities in your life and write them down, assuming that you are still together with that person. Where do they land in the listónumber 1 or are they down around number 5? If they are not at the top of the list then you have to make some serious attitude and lifestyle changes. If you want to get back with your ex you have to make them number 1 in your life! More importantly, you have to convince them that they are at the top of your list and will continue to be in the future, not just for the purpose of resuming your relationship.
Once you've weaned yourself away from the computer, the video games, nights out with your friends or any other distraction it's time to wage the war for his or her heart. You can start by apologizing, in person and sincerely. Invite them to a neutral place where there aren't any memories to get in the way or distract either of you. Tell them you realize that you've lost the most important treasure of your life and that you were a fool to take them for granted. Then leave. That's right, leave! Give them time to think about what you've said. Chances are 50/50 that you'll get a call or a text from them within 24 hours.
If not, go to phase two and send them flowers, preferably to their workplace where everyone can see and give them feedback on what a great person you must be. Call them the next day and ask if they'll have lunch with you. Repeat these steps using a variety of things that they love to receive. When they accept your date, let them talk about themselves. Direct the conversation to them, always, and stay interested. Remember that they are the most fascinating person in the world! For the rest of your relationship you're going to be very, very interested in them and eventually you're going to find that you really enjoy thatóthat's real love.
Avoid texting when you can call or show up in person. If you want them back you shouldn't do so using impersonal means like cell phones. Personal attention is the key to getting your ex back as long as it is sincere and heartfelt.
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